Why should we pay for ourselves when we eat out?

I have a friend who has lived in the US for many years and came back to Vietnam. One time, he invited his father and son to dinner. We had a very pleasant conversation. But when it came time to pay, my friend insisted on splitting the bill and not letting me pay. I was a little unhappy, but this friend told me a story that completely changed my way of thinking.

On the way home, my old friend asked me, “Did splitting the bill make you feel embarrassed?” Since we were close friends, I had nothing to hide, so I nodded. My friend said, let me tell you a story.

At a high school in Wisconsin, a Vietnamese student and an American student went mountain climbing together.

While these two students were climbing the mountain, suddenly they were caught in a landslide of rocks above. The American student was hit by a rock and he thought his leg was broken.

If they waited until the evening when the weather was cold and they were hungry and thirsty, they might have fainted or even died. Then the American student tried to climb up, and the blood from his thigh wound had flowed all over the rock. When he reached the highest rock, his injured leg made it impossible for him to step on the rocks. He couldn’t continue hanging on with just his two hands, so he fell down again.

Already injured and now even more seriously injured, the American boy lay on the rocks in despair. But after just over 10 minutes, the cold and the injuries had made him start to feel numb, he felt that he must quickly escape from here. Then the American boy decided to try climbing up again, and this time he succeeded. When he climbed up the biggest rock, but climbing down to go out with his aching legs was impossible. He closed his eyes, and let his body roll down…

No one expected that this American student would be able to persevere and crawl back to town. Through examination, it was found that his left leg was broken, and two ribs were broken due to rolling from the rock to the ground. Everyone rushed him to the hospital and sent people to save the Vietnamese student. In the cold and fear, the Vietnamese student was lying there gasping for breath, if the rescuers had arrived a little later, he could have lost his life.

When my friend told me this, I noticed my friend's child's face turned a little red and he said, "Uncle, that Vietnamese student is me."

My friend asked, “Do you know why that American student is more resilient than my child?”, I shook my head, not understanding.

My friend replied, “Actually, the reason behind it is very simple, because American children from a very young age, when they go out to eat, they have to pay for themselves. They teach their children the reason for paying for themselves, which is “no matter what happens, no one can pay for you, whether it’s your parents, relatives or friends.”

Therefore, this American student understood that, no matter how dangerous the situation is, if he wants to continue living, he must rely on himself.

Vietnamese students, on the other hand, receive too much help, even if they don't act, they could lose their lives, but they are used to waiting for help from others.

“No one will pay you” , just a simple sentence but has created a characteristic of American independence and determination.

After listening, I naturally wanted to go home and tell my children this story. I wanted to tell them, “sometimes money is not a problem, helping children is not a problem, but in the future, no one will pay you.”

Thien Minh
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